Trip to Orphanage and Finding Spot

***written by guest blogger, Dave***

Yesterday was definitely the longest day of our time in China, partly because of the long 2 hour each way bus trip to the Baoan Children's Welfare Center, and partly because of the emotional drain to see where our daughter has spent her entire life. 

Along with the other adoptive families, we boarded the bus at 8:30 and, after a 30 minute stop to draw blood for the TB tests, we began the trip to Shenzhen. 

The scenery of the trip was a seemingly endless string of 30-40 story apartment buildings. As I look out the window I try to imagine where everyone works and how they spend their free time, and I just cannot do it. They just go on and on and on...

We arrived at the orphanage at around 11:30 and were greeted with smiles, gifts and bottled water by the staff. Shortly, we entered and were shown classrooms, the play area, and the general grounds. The other families were greeted by foster parents and teachers, and we began to wonder if anyone really took notice of Wren or gave her special attention. Shortly after, her teacher came over to talk. Wren smiled at her and was friendly. The teacher told us that Wren was actually put into isolation for a month a second time for her skin rash. Prior to the  second stint she was making progress but the isolation set her back again and she was sent back to the special focus classroom upstairs. 

We then realized that there were NO kids to be seen anywhere, despite the fact that several hundred call Baoan home.  We were ushered past a small dark room of about 20 sleeping tots, but that was it!  No one ever told us why the kids were kept out of sight, except that our guide suggested that some of the older kids could be traumatized by outside visitors and would question why they were not "chosen."  Nevertheless, the experience was eerie and we did not feel like we really were able to glean anything about what her life has been like for the last 2 years. 

We then were escorted to a room with two large round tables and then the food started coming. The feast was anything like we had seen thus far. This was real Chinese food that did not resemble anything we ever ate in America. 

I was expecting to travel back to Guangzhou when we left, but our guide Richard told us we were going to have time to visit the "finding spots" for some of our kids. After stopping at a bus station where one family's child was found, we went to the Songgang People's Hospital to see where our sweet girl was abandoned. 

The hospital was swarming with people much like shopping malls would be on Thanksgiving weekend. People, noise...so much to see. One of the other kids was left beside a basketball court on the hospital grounds, and when our guide asked where the court was located, an employee pointed to a large hole in the ground surrounded by construction vehicles. This part of the child's history was totally removed. 

I look at several young girls among the crowd, and wonder what Wren's birth mother looks like and if there was some infinitetesimal chance she could be there. We take the elevator to the second floor to see where she was left on the day she was born. People are still swarming and I realize that Wren was probably not there long before she was found. Our somber mood seemed to intensify. I try to empathize with her birth mother and the decision that she made, but I just can't seem to understand the desperation that she must have felt. I have to tell myself that Wren was left there because her birth mom felt it was Wren's only chance to have a good life. I will keep telling myself that for a long time and I pray that it is true. 

Leaving to head back to Guangzhou, I again gaze out at the endless apartment buildings full of people. I look down at my beautiful new daughter and her loving mom who will never leave her...a new mom that will die for her. I am so happy we will be able to teach our little girl about Jesus and give her the opportunity to learn about the person of Jesus. I am grateful she will have the opportunity to say yes to him and to tell others, and today I pray that she will make that decision for herself one day. 

Entrance of orphanage

Courtyard of orphanage

The feast!

The "finding spot"

Emotions

Wren is changing and showing her personality more each day.  Turns out she is really a fan of having a Mommy and Daddy.  When she wakes up she opens her eyes and practically jumps into my arms.  

She has become very opinionated and emotional and will quite loudly let everyone know when she is not happy. 

Last night after dinner she looked at us and made a cute little oooo noise and did a summersault and almost fell off the couch. Then she did a few more on the floor.  I will try to get a video of her if she decides to do it again.  

  Sometimes she is still quiet, and other times she is throwing toys and being really wild.  She has started saying mama and she presses her little nose to mine and then gives me this big smile.   

Both Dave and I are missing the kids at home so much, but really loving seeing China and bonding with Wren.  We toured the orphanage yesterday, and Dave is going to write about that.  

Our girl

So we waited in the civil affairs office surrounded by other families waiting to meet their children.  After about 15 minutes they called our name.  I recognized her little face instantly.  I got down on my knees with my heart racing and greeted her as calmly and quietly as I could.  She came to me without a problem and sat quietly on my lap.  I gave her a little yogurt drop and she held it in her mouth the rest of the time we were there. This beautiful girl bravely sat with us and looked around and took in everything.  

  Back at our hotel room she was completely still and quiet most of the afternoon.  I read and sang to her and showed her lots of pictures. She followed me with her eyes, but otherwise did not move unless I picked her up.  At dinner time though she got excited and would open her mouth so wide for noodles.  I was showing her how to sign "more" in between bites and she picked it up so quickly.  After dinner Dave held her for the first time- he sweetly let me work on bonding first.  She sat with him a few seconds and then got up and walked a few steps back to my lap.  

  When it was our bedtime, at 7:30- (thank you jet lag, and crazy adrenaline) We laid her in bed between us and she took the paci I gave her for a little and she went right to sleep and slept all night.  During the night when I woke up I saw that she moves her mouth like she is sucking a paci or her thumb, but there is nothing there.  

So in love with this tiny silent girl so far.  Praying we will have the wisdom to help her become who the Lord created her to be.  

Just before meeting Wren

This morning we met with our guide and exchanged American money for Chinese money.  He told us to expect Wren to be very afraid and that we would need to be very patient.  Part of her story is that she developed a rash and was put into quarantine for a month before we got her referral.  He told us that when he first met her he was afraid for her that she would never be placed in a family because she would not respond at all. However, after being switched to the special focus program she has received more attention and is doing better, but has a long way to go.  We knew all of this when we were matched with her, but when he pulled us aside to share that she seems very traumatized was scary.  My heart breaks for her being mainly alone for a month.  I can't wait to meet her in about 2 hours.  We are ready to love and support her and get her the help she needs to continue healing.  

Travel and exploring

We have had an awesome time so far!  We got to the airport at 4:45 am on Friday and arrived at our hotel at 11:00 am on Saturday. (American time). Our fights were great!  I did get emotional when we were taking off for China- the tears just kept rolling as it hit me that we are really on the way!  The Garden hotel is amazing!  We meet our guide tomorrow in the morning, and will meet Wren at about 2:30 China time.  

Today we have been exploring.  We rode the subway to a really neat Chinese park and went to the Han Dynasty Museum.  We just had a delicious lunch of curry and rice.  People have been very friendly, but we have been getting stared at a lot. This has been an awesome experience so far.  

I'm Leaving on a jet plane

Tomorrow morning we fly out for China.  I am so ready to meet Wren and welcome her to our family.  Our family has been shown such love this week.  

We are blessed to have such great friends and family supporting us and already loving Wren.  It was really hard to leave the kids with my parents today, but I know they will have a great time.  

Tomorrow will be a long day of travel, but I will totally enjoy having tons of time to read.  Thanks for so many prayers and well wishes.  We have hearts full and are so excited to see China tomorrow.  We should be there by Saturday morning USA time.  

Thanks for joining in our journey to Wren. Feel free to comment. 

I Am Not Alone

I am not alone, I am not alone, You will go before me, You will never leave me
This song by Carrie Jobe has been running through my head as I think of our daughter.

You see as I think of her at one day old being left by the elevator.  I picture Jesus saying- you are not alone.  This world is broken, but I will make something new from this sorrow.

I think of her birth mother after carrying her daughter, feeling her move in her womb, giving birth and then walking away my heart breaks.  I think of God's promise to her- you are not alone.

I think of the ways that God has confirmed and whispered to my heart- you are not alone.  Your family is part of the world and I love all of my children.  You are part of my plan for hope.  Go out of your comfort zone and see that you can provide a home for a child who needs one.

So we travel in just over three weeks, and I am so excited to meet her and be part of her story.  I will try to update here about the trip and maybe when we come home too.  Thanks for reading!
Emily

Isaiah 41:10  Fear not for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. 

We are adopting!

Adoption has been something that I always thought that I would consider after a college experience volunteering at an orphanage in the Dominican Republic.  The children who lived there really opened my eyes.  I had read lots of stories where children were orphaned, but to spend a week loving them really gave me a heart for hurting children.

Adoption started growing in my heart after Samuel was born.  I was waking up at night thinking about kids without a family.  I began to pray about adopting and after some time I told Dave my crazy idea.  We spent a long time praying individually about adopting and both felt like God was calling us to action in our faith.  We submitted our papers to an adoption agency and began what in the adoption world is called the paperchase.

Around the same time that we began feeling called to adopt a tiny girl was born in China.  She was found alone by the elevator doors in the hospital.  She spent a month in the hospital before being moved to the local orphanage in her province.  After tons of paperwork, checklists and preparation we were finally matched with this little girl.  She is now 2 years old.  We received her referral on Valentines Day and we just found out that we will be meeting her on May 11, 2015.  We will be flying to China on May 8.

This blog is to share our journey to meet our sweet girl, Wren.